I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Randomize
