He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
