Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
