dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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