yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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