It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
