Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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