bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
