Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
