Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Randomize
