uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Randomize
