I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Randomize
