i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
