Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
