Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
