Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize
