at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
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