how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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