it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
