I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Randomize
