Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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