i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Randomize
