This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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