Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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