and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize