yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
