He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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