So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize