I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
