Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
