Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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