Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
