And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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