"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
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