got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Randomize
