Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I have surprise drugs for everyone
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
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