I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize