I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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