So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize
