Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
