when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Randomize
