I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
