I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
