So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
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