The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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