She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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