so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
