id be glad to
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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