BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
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