I wish i was in the wii world.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
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