he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
